Portunt Nownsmunt Everee Won!

[Donnie Gillum]

Kum Janyoowary leventh, 2 thowsand n neyen, us'nz n dis heer nek uh da wudz in Kintukee haz a bran nu litul babee grandotter. Yep, shor nuf! If'n ya kin skrol arown on da paj uh litul bit ye kin C sum pikchurs of da litul bugger. Sheee kaim n2 dis wurl a reelee litin'em hav hit at da top o hur lungs. Sheez got har az blak az a litul nativ Mercan Injun. Must’uh got dat frum hur daddee, Steeevee. She tipt dem dar skails n at sevun pownz 'n 5 o dem dar ounsus 2 go wythe awl dem pownz.

Sheee wuz born abowt 20 Nchuz 'n nuther haf loooong. Sheez a litul bigger'n a rat, a litul smaller'n a possum…mor bowt da siz uh won uh dem litul haf grohd dubblee streyept skunks. I cawled hur “Papoose” cawz day didunt hav a naym o sum sort stuk on'er yit.

But dey finalee pict won owt fer hur. Day wint'n stuk da naym o Wynter Kaielle Dawn Burch (dats duh kerwreck spellun bye da waye) on hur. Dat sekund naym iz pernownct "Kay - ell". Duh "Dawn" part wuz n awhnor uh yerz truuulee heer, 'n duh "Burch" part wuz aftur hur daddee uh korse.

I steal cawl hur “Papoose” cawz shee shur luuks lyk wonna dem dar purtee litul Injun babeez. Sheez knot vary owld ryt now, but I kin tel awlreddee dat shee shore duz luv hur papaw.

-Donnie